So Fathers Day…..
Fathers Day has come and gone and now that my Dad isn’t here it is a day that is a little sad. I hate those adds about fathers, argh it kills me and I start to get the lump in my throat and tear up immediately. I miss him, life is different without him and there will always be an empty space.
My dad and I didn’t always see eye to eye. We often disagreed with each others way of seeing and doing things..almost everything, what I did with my money, what I fed my kids and the places I would go. But there was always one thing that was certain I always knew my dad loved me.
I hate the fact that now that he’s gone I’m understanding more about why he was like he was. I’m seeing him better and its all making sense.
We are trying to love in an imperfect world. We are broken people endeavouring to act in an unbroken way. This is so hard. It is crazy to think that we will coast through parenting….loving and caring for others, without hurting them in some way. It is impossible to think that we will be perfect and not have issues no matter how ‘good’ we feel we act or how ‘good’ we are. We are broken people living in an imperfect and broken world trying to be perfect, love perfectly and expect to be perfectly loved back.
Fathers day isn’t about being the perfect father. It isn’t about being disappointed about not being loved perfectly, although Father’s day is about love, but not just about your father loving you. Its about you loving your father. Its about forgiveness, its about overlooking the disappointments and hurts and looking beyond that.
It always seems to get back to Love.